“There are plenty of good ways to break up with someone
and it doesn't include a Post-It.”
Sex and the City
Carrie Bradshaw might have gotten a post-it, but all I got was a text message. Which actually was fitting since Mr. Arizona and I spent more time text messaging than we did in person, that's what happens when you date someone in a different state. I’m not surprised the break up happened. I knew it was never going to work out. He lived a state away and neither of us wanted anything long distance. I always knew he would start to see someone else, after all he starting seeing me when he had a girlfriend. I always knew it was casual. I even spent Saturday night getting to know Mr. Brazil a little better. But surprisingly it still hurt. I always thought that if he and I ever got our shit together at the same time we would work out. Turns out we both were ready for a relationship at the same time, the only problem was I was ready for one with him and he was ready for one with someone else. We always did have bad timing.
As I sit here once again in the Phoenix airport and drowning my sorrows (and a few tears) in my beer I started to think about the men in my life. The one’s I’ve thrown away, the ones that have thrown me away, and those few that have stuck with me through all of them. I’ve met some amazing guys, and some not so amazing guys, but I’ve never met Mr. Right. I’ve meet Mr. Right now but the actual Mr. Right has alluded me. Normally a break-up would have me giving up hope that my true soul mate is out there, but I spent the weekend with two couples that showed me what it really means to be in love, my parents and my grandparents. I flew out to Ohio over the weekend to spend time with my family and to be there while my grandmother had surgery. It wasn’t a major surgery, but she’s been in bad health so any surgery turns into a major operation.
My grandfather refused to eat while my grandmother was in surgery. Even after she was in recovery he wouldn’t eat until she woke up. We sat there from 6 in the morning until she woke up at 2 that afternoon. Everyone coming and going to pass the time. But he wouldn’t budge. And you should have seen his face when she finally woke up. It was an expression of true love that I’ve never seen. And as soon as he got to her side, she grabbed him around the neck, pulled him towards her, and gave him a romantic only seen in the movies kiss. After 60 years they are just falling more and more in love with each other every day. And while she slept he just sat there staring at her face. One hand holding hers and the other rubbing her hair. The rest of us read, and talked, and watched TV. But he would just sit there and watch her. Her guardian angel.
That night I watched my parents leave the hospital holding hands. After 40 years they can’t go more than a few minutes without touching each other. Last weekend they had to sleep on couches since there weren’t enough beds for everyone. But they refused to sleep on separate couches. Instead they even slept head to foot on the couch so they can fit. I asked my mom, why not sleep apart. She responded, we don’t sleep apart. It’s amazing that after all those years they still crave each other’s touch.
After spending time with them I realized soul mates really do exist. Sometimes you find your soul mate when you are in kindergarten, sometimes you find them right next door, and sometimes they find you when you least expect it.
